Translation In Progress: The Quest For Equivalence

On attitude

2010-11-14T02:07:00.002+01:00

I have reached a peace of mind.

How? Well, the way I have it figured, being a freelance translator means I could be brought down by two things. One, if the economy collapses for good. True, not a very happy prospect but too far beyond any control for me to loose too much sleep over it. Two, if I screw up. Ergo, I only have to worry about not screwing up, something entirely within and under my control. Hence the peace of mind.

Goodnight.

General reflection

2010-07-23T20:08:00.003+02:00

This has already been published elsewhere. Still:

Translation is a bitch. Latex-clad, whip-wielding, dominating bitch. And we are the doggies.

I need a break.

On paradoxes of the trade

2010-07-14T22:11:00.003+02:00

Observation: the quantity of translation jobs is reversely proportional to the quantity of time available to complete said jobs.

Now, I'm not complaining on people calling in, demanding my services. It seems, however, that customer service representatives and office managers at translation agencies have some kind of instinct, forcing them to call at the worst possible time. I should know, I've been one for a while. Or maybe it's the summer and the fact that most people are away on holidays and I'm one of the few suckers to stay behind and work.

What do you think? Hello? Anyone there?

On freelancing

2010-07-09T18:53:00.004+02:00

Freelancing: 1. To perform a task on your own away from a company. 2. An independent worker. 3. To urinate without using your hands. (Urban Dictionary)

You know, there's something deeply philosophical about definition 3.

On proofreading

2010-07-07T11:21:00.002+02:00

There's nothing glamorous about proofreading. It's tedious, time-consuming, underpaid and absolutely essential. Nobody cares about proofreaders and yet they are indispensable.

It's rather sad that the world holds so little respect for those brave men and women, who obediently and diligently disentangle the knots and puzzles left to them by translators. And the knots and puzzles are always there becasue translators are essentially divided into two groups: those who are behind schedule and those who don't realize it yet.

And proofreading can be frustrating at times. Well, an experienced proofreader is probably immune to that but every time I get to proofread something of, shall we say, questionable quality, even my wife keeps her distance from me as I yell verbal abuse in the translator's general direction. All the more reason to respect those who do it on a daily basis.

So the next time you open a translated book, take a minute to think about the translator and then about the man or woman who actually made the translator's work readable.

On ambitions and the disappointment that follows

2010-04-24T03:03:00.003+02:00

When I first contemplated taking up translation as profession, I had ambitions. And not just any ambitions. I wanted to really make it out there. I wanted to be acclaimed and recognized, I wanted people asking and quoting my opinion. I pictured myself as the next Edith Grossman.

Noticed the past tense? Good. Because those ambitions are no more.

After a few years of deluding myself I have finally realised that all those things above will not happen. Why? Why, indeed. Someone believing in destiny or some other form of determinism would probably say it wasn't meant to be. Which really doesn't work for me, because I don't believe in destiny. I believe in cause and effect. Ergo, I must have done something wrong along the way. Perhaps I didn't try enough. Or I did but it didn't work. Or perhaps there is something wrong with my face.

Don't get me wrong - I'm quite content with what I have achieved thus far. I have customers, I make enough money to carry on without counting every single penny and the texts I translate are sometimes quite entertaining. In general, I'm OK.

And therein lies the problem. It's just 'OK'. Nothing more. I know that there are probably dozens of people who would gladly swap places with me and be 'just OK', but that's beside the point. I have put my ambitions aside, yes. I haven't forgotten them, though. Subconsciously, I'm still waiting for something. A breakthrough that would finally put me on the map.

And I'm afraid that's all there is and ever will be - waiting, until one day I realise that my life has all but passed in the general state of OK-ness. Which is not a very happy thought.

Round and round we go...

2010-03-12T03:26:00.002+01:00

Remember that flashback I wrote about?

Well, it's no longer a flashback. It's a full-fledged deja vu. However, it's only been 6 mugs of coffee this time and it won't be 4 AM for another 33 minutes, so we're making progress.

Right?

Flashback

2010-01-27T14:23:00.000+01:00

It's 4 AM.

Standing on the balcony, watching numbly as the sky slowly turns grey.

Barely noticing that the cigarette is all but smoked down to the filter.

Shivering from the cold of the morning and the exhaustion of 17 hours of non-stop work.

The effect of 9 rather large mugs of coffee slowly wearing out.

Good Lord, how I miss it.

Returning to translation, symptoms of

2010-01-26T16:28:00.000+01:00

Even thought my official return to the job will not be for several weeks, my organism has decided to switch back into translator mode.

In other words, my back hurts as hell, my eyes are sore and charmingly bloodshot, and my head is being pounded by a thousand John Bonzo Bonhams on speed.

Welcome back.

The Inevitable Conclusion

2010-01-22T11:59:00.000+01:00

As stated above, I'm returning to my profession. The circle is now complete and the inevitable conclusion is as follows:

Once a translator, always a translator.

Sounds a bit Narnian to me, but then again, translators do operate on the border of two or more different worlds.

Out of curiosity, is there anyone actually reading this?

Return of the prodigal son

2010-01-16T13:15:00.000+01:00

I have tried not being a translator.

Didn't work.

So as of the middle of February, I'm back in business. Or rather, starting my own. What awaits me is a gargantuan pile of paperwork, close-call skirmishes with bureaucracy and the ever-growing, ever-thirsty Charybdis of taxation.

And you know what?

I already can't wait.

On becoming something else

2009-10-10T19:21:00.000+02:00

Due to a number of reasons too dull to be worth mentioning here I 've recently found myself pondering on my future. Particularly my future as a translator. To make my ponderings somewhat organized, I've prepared a list. Here goes:

Why continue translating:

1. I'm not good at anything else. Actually, I'm not very good at that too but at least it's familiar.
2. The crisis is still out there which means that drastic career changes are probably not a very good idea at the moment.
3. Despite all the nights and weekends lost to the job, it still feels pretty cool to see your translation on a bookshelf.
4. I don't think I would be able to become a regular nine-to-five-behind-the-desk kind of employee.

Why abandon translation and pursue something else:

1. Money.
2. Having nights and weekends off.
3. Money.
4. Leaving work at 5 PM on Friday and starting to think about it again on my way back on Monday morning. Yes, I know this is redundant to item 2. Still, it's important.
5. Having some firm ground beneath my feet, understood as permanent employment.
6. Have I already mentioned money?

I'll have to think about it.

On translator's integrity

2009-04-22T16:19:00.000+02:00

A few posts ago I made a declaration that if somebody was ever to ask me to translate one more Footprint guide, I would tear their heart out and eat it.

Well, I didn't.

Circumstances aside, I once again proved to myself that integrity is not a preferable trait of character in this profession. Even though I still consider translating Footprint guides as a premature damnation for the sins of my youth, I realized that a good translator (understood as a translator able to make a living off translation without the need of taking side jobs such as distributing leaflets or robbing liquor stores) cannot afford too much integrity. In other words, the sole principle a translator should abide by is the lack thereof. You are offered a text to translate, you accept it. And any time you feel like making statements about what you will and will not translate in the future, remember this simple truth: there are dozens of people who would love to take over your job. Their quality may be lower, their efficiency not even close to yours... but they don't bitch about the job. So this is my message to myself: shut up and do your work. And stop deluding yourself that you're something more than a muscle (or head) for hire.

Here's a little something to illustrate the point:

On CAT Tools

2008-11-05T21:53:00.000+01:00

Recently I've been forced to learn the use of a certain CAT tool, namely Wordfast. Reason: all the competition is already using CATs, so we must catch up. Right. So I got properly (snigger) trained in the ways of the Wordfast and told to immediately commence aligning Translation Memories, compiling glossaries, etc.

And you know what? I actually enjoy it.

I've always been rather sceptical about translation-facilitating tools, seeing them as yet another obstacle to overcome. I thought to myself, what the fuck do I need Trados or Wordfast for? I'm perfectly fit with my C-workset: coffee, computer, cigarettes. I don't need any software. Software is for loosers. Real men use nothing but word processors.

So my point is, I've been proven wrong. Again. Working with a CAT that automatically translates all the iterative vocabulary and phrases, even whole paragraphs (and trust me, you learn to appreciate that when you translate agreements and contracts) greatly improves your efficiency. So you can work faster and process more text. Much more text. In fact, whole tons of text. Which basically returns you to the starting point, i.e. considering rest as a rare privilege.

Still, I enjoy it. For now.

Currently on my working playlist:
The Stills "Oceans Will Rise"
I Love You But I've Chosen Darkness "Fear Is On Our Side"
N.E.R.D. "Seeing Sounds"
The Subways "Young For Eternity"

Update

2008-10-30T14:31:00.001+01:00

Nothing new to report. Apart maybe from marriage, landing a permanent job and becoming a respectable, responsible member of society.

Phew.

Currently translating: Robin Gauldie "Amsterdam: History, Mystery, Walks". It's short, it's well-written, it's not all about coffee shops and Red Light District. I am a happy, happy translator, yes I am.

How it feels to have a weekend off :)

2008-09-13T12:04:00.000+02:00

It would be nice to find out some day :). For now, weekends are workdays, the main difference from regular Mondays or Wednesdays being the attire, i.e. lack of it. Absurd as it may sound, I actually like translating on weekends. Probably because if I work on something on weekends, this something is actually the whole thing. In other words: on weekends I don't get urgent calls at home/messages at the office that something has popped up and needs to be done pronto. Much as I like the adrenaline of an express translation of a confidential contract between major businesses, with this sweet knowledge that if I screw up, we're all screwed up, it nevertheless is a distraction. And on weekends such distractions are nonexistent, which is good. However, working on weekends means that instead of relaxing and fooling around, I'm, in fact, at work, which is bad. Oh well, that's the beauty of it all.

Currently translating: a HUGE manual for a major international shipping company, whose name I am not to disclose :)

How to efficiently organize your working time

2008-09-10T00:25:00.000+02:00

Yeah. I wish I knew that. Initially I thought about this one as another Law of Translation, but then I realized that it's not the job, it's just me, wasting time over "Medieval II" and "Jedi Outcast", instead of working. And I know I'm going to pay for it, because the deadline approaches with the speed of a running train and I'm still somewhere around page 15. Of 122. Deary, deary me. Oh well, sooner or later every translator learns that at times sleeping is a luxury you can't afford. This, in fact, is a Law of Translation. May the Force be with me on this one. Goodnight.

Laws of translation - continued

2008-08-11T20:58:00.000+02:00

Law of translation: a layman in translation hardly ever acknowledges the effort required from a translator to deliver an acceptable rendition.

Banality? Indeed. But a painfully true banality all the same. The most widespread approach to translation, presented by laymen, might be summarized as follows:

'You know the language so, like, you can translate. What's the difficulty in that?'

Well, you can't. Just like having a driver's license does not automatically make you eligible for WRC. I wish that some day people would acknowledge the simple fact that translation IS a hard and demanding job that not everyone can do. But I guess that I might as well wish for a universal peace on Earth.

My tendency for infrequency is offending... Who?

2008-07-31T09:46:00.000+02:00

It's been almost a year since I last updated this log. The world has turned and so has the tide. I'm still a translator, although I can't shake the feeling that I've actually gone a little bit too deep into it. Anyway, the log is officially restored and revived. However, instead of posting some random theoretical concepts I will concentrate more on the practical consequences of being a translators. Just so you know and be aware of what this prestigious and elite job can do to you.

Currently translating: Chris Nelson & Demi Taylor "Surfing The World". Into Polish. I solemnly swear that if somebody ever asks me to do another guidebook by Footprint publishing, I will tear their heart out and eat it.

Laws of translation #1

2007-08-21T17:16:00.000+02:00

The first and most fundamental law of translation is that people either want you to do some job while you're on a well-deserved holiday (and when you're up and running again, the phone is solemnly dead) or they want something translated (usually something big and packed with specialistic jargon) when all you want is for the whole wide world to leave you alone and let you die in peace of exhaustion. I think is because of quantum. This is a much more convenient explanation than the one where people are just inconsiderate morons and have an inclination to bugger you at the wrongest of moments. In other words, the First Law Of Translation says that translators never work when they should and always work when they don't want to. Well, that's the beauty of this job. Anyway, it's good to remember that there are still people out there who have it worse. The inmates in Guantanamo, for example. Or Albanians.

First Glimpse

2007-02-27T14:09:00.000+01:00

So it begins...

This weblog will be dedicated to the art of translation. And to the nightmare that translation becomes to its apprentices at times. Quite frequently, come to think of it. Anyway, we can't really predict what the exact content of this site will look like but what we can predict is that it'll always have something to do with the least appreciated freelance job mankind has ever invented. More or less. So enjoy the posts as they come up (infrequently) and contribute in the comments. Or not.

PS. The plural doesn't mean that there is more than one author. It's just that we like the Royal We.